I am so tired of my appearence I am so tired of my body I want to violently detach myself from it fast and loud as a car crash I want to emerge from my skin and bones and muscles and fat and nerves and everything else and let it fall on the floor like a piece of clothing I’ve been waiting all day long to take off and never pick it up again it doesn’t fit me and never will and I am tied on it and tired of it I want to get rid of it close it all folded up in the closet I want to be a hurricane or a cloud or dissolve in the water I want to be sand that slips through fingers indistinguishable from the rest or completely invisible I want no reflections or mirrors or anything I want to be like haze at night like intangible as smoke I just want to feel the wind